How High Over Your Head?
by Pathas Li
Summary: A series in which our characters-no fancy summary-they just plain get high. Chapter 2, the quest to catch Gilliam.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimor: I don't own Outlaw Star, but I own Pathas. No animals were harmed in this film. Warning: Stay away from marujania and staple guns after reading this.  
  
Pathas, the young blondeish boy, was once again taking a walk down the street toward Starwind and Hawking Enterprises. Gene, Jim, Melfina, and Pathas were planning on a nice trip to the zoo. Although Pathas was still wondering what Jim and Gene had for a surprise. According to Gene, the surprise was gonna, "Send him flyin".  
  
Pathas: Fuckin A man! I don't wanna go to a zoo. The bite-marks from the midgets just disapeared!  
  
Pathas then remembered a week ago at the wrestling match they attended, ten bucks and a free pair of sunglasses to whoever could fight ten midgets at once. Pathas accepted, broke his sunglasses after making a dirty comment to Melfina, got slapped so hard the glasses shattered into powder and the midgets ran in terror.  
  
Pathas's left side of his face still had the bright red mark. He reached the door and knocked, Jim answered the door with a vaccum cleaner and a panda bear on a leash.  
  
Pathas: What the-  
  
Jim: Man come in!  
  
Jim then rode the panda with sucking up a familiar smoke from the room. Pathas followed them into the kitchen, there was a smashed up smoke detector on the floor. The ceiling was completely shrouded in smoke. Gene and Melfina sat at the table laughing.  
  
Gene: Jim! We need more smoke.  
  
Jim: Fuck man! The vaccum cleaner can't take much more of this. *Begins sucking up more smoke.*  
  
Pathas: Hold up, what's goin on?  
  
Gene then tossed him a joint of pot.  
  
Pathas: Ah, I get it. *Sticks it in his mouth, in the next second he's puffed the thing to its limit*  
  
Gene: Holy shit...  
  
Melfina: *Laughs insanely* Take us back a year and we'd call you Puff Daddy!  
  
Pathas then shot the smoke from his mouth and laughed along with everyone else. Jim's vaccum exploded and the panda ended up getting the munchies, so it kicked them out of the house.  
  
Jim: What the hell man, some panda just kicked us out of the house.  
  
Gene: Man we'd better get back in there and ring his ass out man!  
  
Melfina: What about the zoo?  
  
Pathas: Yeah man, I wanna see the monkeys!  
  
Gene: And the sea animal show!  
  
Melfina: But I wanna go to the petting zoo first.  
  
Gene: Let's go!  
  
They went to the zoo, Jim and Gene went to the sea animal show while Pathas and Melfina went to the petting zoo.  
  
Melfina: I can't wait to see the animals!  
  
Pathas: Cool, do they have the monkeys here?  
  
Melfina: Strangely yes.  
  
Pathas: Hey-all yeah!  
  
They put a quarter in the animal feed and went to the sheep section. Melfina was feeding the baby lambs, Pathas comes walking over with a sheep. Both of them have a joint in their mouth.  
  
Melfina: Pathas what are you doing getting a sheep high?!  
  
Pathas: Melfina this isn't any sheep, he's a ram!  
  
Melfina: Does that make a diffrence?  
  
Pathas: ......did the high wear off?  
  
Melfina: Yeah.  
  
Pathas: Here *Tosses her a few joints* let's get this petting zoo something to think about!  
  
In the next second, Pathas, Melfina, the ram, and a monkey are trying to figure out how to milk a cow.  
  
Pathas: Aw man I don't know how this thing works.  
  
Monkey: I think you cut its head off.  
  
Melfina: No! They don't kill them for the milk.  
  
Ram: Man.....I'm so hor-or-or-orny (Says in the accent of a ram)  
  
Then the ram gazes at the utter and grabs it, milk shoots out which startles it.  
  
Ram: Holy shit!  
  
Melfina: So that's how it works.  
  
Pathas: Damn, we watch you do that to put milk in our coffee every day Mel and we couldn't figure this- *POW! Melfina punches him out the barn house*  
  
Melfina: That wasn't funny!  
  
Pathas and the ram are sitting by the animal corn feeder.  
  
Ram: I gotta eat something...  
  
Pathas: Hold up, we need a quarter! Get me the monkey!  
  
Melfina is petting a deer, then it tries to suck on her tit.  
  
Melfina: EEE! ECHI! *Smacks the deer into venesin*  
  
She then notices all the animals crowded around the feeder machines.  
  
Melfina: Now why is everyone-PATHAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Pathas, the ram, and the monkey have busted the machines open, so all the animals are eating.  
  
Pathas: Man, this is the best idea I've thought of yet! *Puffs another joint, unlike Bill Clinton, he inhales*  
  
Clinton: You cynical asshole!  
  
Pathas: Clinton, you shmuk! You don't even know what cynical means.  
  
Meanwhile, at the sea animal show.......  
  
Gene: *Laughs along with the crowd* Man that's funny, the seal is humping the other seal! *Puffs at the same time with the crowd, Jim is the only one who's inhaling.*  
  
Jim: Gene you're gonna get the munchies soon, and I don't want to eat fish!  
  
Gene: Sorry man....hey, don't the trainers look funny?  
  
Jim: So do the animals.  
  
What the crowd doesn't notice, the animals are dressed as their trainers, they're making the trainers act like animals, unintentially.   
  
Jim: Must be our imagination.  
  
Gene: HOLD UP! *Leaps down to the area and grabs a sea lion in the trainer suit by the neck* Okay buddy, I know those aren't seals down there!  
  
Crowd: GASP!   
  
Jim: *Smokes a joint*  
  
Trainer: Finally!  
  
Gene: Those are sea lions!  
  
Crowd: Oh!  
  
Jim: *Dressed up as Gilliam, laughs insanely.*  
  
Gilliam: *Dressed as Jim, laughs sarcasticly* Ha...Ha....Ha...Ha...Ha...  
  
Gene: What the fuck?  
  
Trainers: Dammit!  
  
Seals dressed as trainers: We'll shock them with these cattle prods to fix that sir!  
  
The Seals shock the Trainers with cattle prods, the crowd laughs.  
  
Back at the petting zoo, everyone is lying about.  
  
Pathas: *Throws up* Man........I don't ever want to hear anyone say the word munchies again.  
  
Ram: But I like saying munchies!  
  
Pathas: No one say munchies!  
  
Melfina: Pathas, you said "Don't say munchies" Then you say munchies after the ram says munchies. So saying munchies after saying not to say munchies is making us want to say munchies even if someone else said munchies inwhich you said munchies after him that made us say munchies a lot because of you saying munchies after you said not to say munchies! *Gasps for air, then smokes another joint*  
  
Pathas....Damn.....  
  
Monkey: I don't think that we shouldn't say munchies, cause its such a cool word. I mean, say it munchies....  
  
Note: The screen is shifting from character to character in a circle like in That 70s Show.  
  
Ram: Munchies....  
  
Melfina: Munchies!  
  
Pathas: Munchies....hey Mel, does saying munchies make you wanna go into the barn house and have sex?  
  
Melfina: No.  
  
Pathas: Damn...well say it again!  
  
Melfina: Munchies!  
  
Pathas: Again!  
  
Melfina: Munchies!  
  
Ram the monkey laughs insanely.  
  
Pathas: Any closer?  
  
Melfina: I'd consider it now.  
  
Pathas: Then say munchies again!  
  
Melfina: But it isn't funny anymore.  
  
Pathas: Try saying it while watching ram punch monkey!  
  
Melfina: Okay!  
  
Pathas: Ram, punch monkey!  
  
Melfina: *Watches ram smack the monkey with his hoove.* Munchies! *Laughs insanely* Man, now I feel horny.  
  
A minute later...  
  
Ram: Hey monkey, did they go to the barn.  
  
Monkey: No.  
  
Ram: Okay.  
  
Monkey: Think it was the hamock right beside the barn.  
  
Ram: Oh yeah!  
  
Back to Gene and Jim,  
  
Gene: Man, you think Pathas has fucked Melfina yet.  
  
Jim: Say munchies.  
  
Gene: Munchies.  
  
Jim: ...............Yeah, he's fucking her.  
  
Gene: *Puffs a joint.* Oh well...munchies!  
  
*Jim takes a staple gun.*  
  
Gene: Holy shit! Staple gun!  
  
Jim: Let's run amuck and shoot people!  
  
Gene: That'll piss everyone off, then we'll get beaten.  
  
Jim: Gilliam, get the camera, let's do this like in Jackass!  
  
Gene: What a perfect idea! What could be better?  
  
Jim: Fucking Melfina?  
  
Gene: Stop that Jim! Your parents had Pathas and I raise you to have Jimmie-Kun fans! Not to have people thinking you were a future-style redneck like we are!  
  
Jim: What was that mother fucker?  
  
Gene: Yeah that's the pot talking.  
  
Jim: Must be.  
  
Gilliam holds the camera from the bushes while Jim and Gene run around the crowds bombed stoned while they's shoot people with staple guns.  
  
Back to Pathas.  
  
Pathas: Hey! Check this out!  
  
Everyone gathers round a machine that can read an animal's mind.  
  
Pathas: Hey Ram! Try it!  
  
Ram: Okay! *Steps into the machine* *His Thoughts*: Maaaaaaa! So hor-or-or-or-orny! Need an innocent lamb to bang!  
  
Everyone scratches the back of their heads.  
  
Ram's Thoughts: Aw man, I hope no one heard that. Maaaaa. What the Fu-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-uck do they know? This is cool thinking, I should do it more. Back seat, windows up, that's the way I like to fa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!  
  
Mel slaps the ram.  
  
Ram: Holy shit! You guys can hear my thoughts! This machine isn't bull shit!  
  
Gene and Jim walk up to them.  
  
Pathas: Dude, we've lost all our joints.  
  
Gene: Who could steal twelve thousand joints of pot?  
  
Meanwhile, Gilliam and the monkey are smoking in the Outlaw Star.  
  
Gilliam: Ha.....Ha......Ha........Ha.........Ha.......Ha..................Ha...Ha.............................Ha...  
  
Pathas: Dammit! Oh well...will our heroes get their stolen pot back from that soda can and hairy freak? Or will they lose their low? Hey, if I do another chapter you think I'm gonna let our heroes get screwed? And does Jim give a damn about what Gene said? Did Pathas really fuck Mel? Where's my fuckin rugby trophy? Why do the Patriots suck? You know they're up in the division with the Jets, they all suck! Can so much pot fuck up one's system? I think not! Don't send reviews saying, "How dare you insult the Patriots or Jets!" .....Ah send it anyway! 


	2. Too Powerful Pot?

Disclaimor: Putting this up just for the helluvit. Now where are we? Oh yeah! Gilliam and the one monkey from the petting zoo have stolen their joints.  
  
Pathas: This sucks, there's no way that we can get our joints back!  
  
Gene: NOOOOOOO! *Oscar-winning war scene: Gene drops to his knees and cries as the Outlaw Star flies into space* You bastards!  
  
Melfina: Snap out of it!  
  
Gene: Fine.  
  
Ram (Still in the mind reader machine): Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I wonder if Melfina's wet!  
  
Melfina: (Speechless as her eyes burn with rage)  
  
Pathas: Aw Shnaps....  
  
Ram: Suck my caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!  
  
Melfina slaps him into space.  
  
Jim: Poor little horny ram.  
  
Meanwhile, at the Outlaw Star.  
  
Gilliam: I can't steer the ship right....Ha.....ha.....ha.....  
  
Monkey: What the hell am I doing here?  
  
Gilliam: Shuttup you monkey.......No one should argue with the fastest, most advanced, and stoned space ship in the galaxy!  
  
Then an imprint of a ram is made in the side of the ship.  
  
Gilliam: The hell was that?  
  
Back to the others.  
  
Pathas: ........what? I gotta think here? Jim, you do the thinking.  
  
Jim: Awright mother fucker!  
  
Gene: Why don't we go to-  
  
All: No!  
  
Gene: Fuck.....  
  
Then a homeless man runs up to them, grabs Jim by the collar.  
  
Homeless Guy: I've tried my best to hide, but they're everywhere they always see the smoke!!! THEY ALWAYS SEE THE SMOKE!! *Cries for a bit, holds up a joint* This is the Magickal Pot, one smoke of this mother fucker can make you float.  
  
Jim: *Takes the pot* Thanks man.  
  
Homeless Guy: But beware! You might not be able to contain its strength!  
  
Jim: Whatever, *Pushes the homeless guy to the ground, takes a puffs of the pot.*  
  
Melfina: JIM! You heard him say there were consequences!  
  
Jim: Fuck that-Oh.....shit....... *Begins to float*  
  
Jim then sees Gary Coleman smokin a cigar in his Eufrau....or whatever the car is called. Then Adam Sandler appears in a devil costume with a bull roasting over the fire, Adam starts talking gibberish.  
  
Gary: Whatchoo talkin bout Satan?  
  
Jim:.....woah......  
  
Melfina takes a puff. She then sees Rocky and Ali boxing while Pathas and Gene take turns kicking Harry McDougal in the long johns. Jimi Hendrix smashes them all countless time over the head.  
  
Melfina: ......  
  
Gene take his puff, sees Melfina with Xray vision, seeing a baby in her stomach.  
  
Gene: I knew I was good!  
  
Pathas takes a puff, finishing the joint. He begins to stumble. Then finds himself walking through the desert, following a half-naked-female desendant to Spanish tribes! Ha!  
  
Pathas: Aw man...too much...  
  
Spanish Half-Naked Female: Follow me.  
  
Pathas walks through the desert until he sees Jim Morrison.  
  
Jim Morrison: Pathas.... hey.  
  
Pathas: Hey Jim Morrison...Why'd you call me here?  
  
Jim Morrison: Because I've got nothing better to do than take stoned people through deserts .  
  
Pathas: Hey man you guys had good music.  
  
JM: Shut up, I've called you don't here just to watch something strange.  
  
Then a large platform appears with Chris Rock fighting Eminem.  
  
Pathas: Go Chris!  
  
JM: Go Gillbert Godfree!  
  
Pathas: Who?   
  
Jim (Hawking): *Appears* thing he means the annoying guy who played the orphanage guy in Problem Child.  
  
Gillbert appears on the platform and gets ready to fight, but then Junior comes up with a steel chairand smashes him ovr the head with it, then he takes a microphone.  
  
Junior: You know something Jim!? The whole world know that I'm the most powerful kid alive!  
  
The platform turns into a wrestling ring, Jim steps in and fight with Junior. The Chris Rock throws Eminem into the sun.  
  
Chris Rock: Talk about burnin your turkey. *Then Commentates Jim and Junior's fight.* The Red-haired kracker boy has taken the fuckin baseball bat and is beating th shit out of the boy who thinks he's all smart, that god damn kracker!  
  
Pathas: Jim, don't let yourself lose!  
  
Gene: *Appears.* Use the force Jim!  
  
Jim: Was force!  
  
Gene: Use the *Winks* special force.  
  
Jim kicks Junior in the nuts, then tosses him out the ring.  
  
Chris Rock: Kracker-boy #2 wins, Kracker #2 wins!  
  
Jim: Hey Chris shut the fuck up!  
  
Chris Rock: Shut the fuck up? The fuck you mean, shut the fuck up? That's it, I'm gonna kick your ass.  
  
Then they all get control of their pot power and regain control. They begin to float into the air.  
  
Back to the ship, Gilliam is enjoying his pot.  
  
Gilliam: Is it a crime to be so smart?  
  
He then notices everyone float up to the ship.  
  
Gilliam: Dammit!  
  
Monkey: What do we do?  
  
Gilliam: We will take off!  
  
The ship then takes off with ease.  
  
Gene: Dammit!  
  
Jim then inhales the smoke that has appeared around him.  
  
Jim: Smoke from the dope is in the air!  
  
Everyone gets high enough using the smoke, they then float to Gilliam's new destination.  
  
Gilliam floats around the ship, the notices Pathas and the others closing in.  
  
Gilliam: It's time to bring matters into my own hands. Monkey, get the.......special pot in the main cannon!  
  
The monkey goes into the main cannon, then Gilliam fires him at the others.  
  
Monkey: I'm gonna scratch your eyes out!  
  
The monkey floats past them.  
  
Monkey: Dammit!  
  
Gilliam: Oh no.....  
  
An hour later, back at Starwind and Hawking Enterprises....  
  
Gilliam: I don't know how you all can have so much fun watching suck torture.  
  
Pathas: Shut the fuck up. Go again panda!  
  
The panda then takes the top of Gilliam's head off and pisses into the little can robot. He puts the top back on, and shakes Gilliam. Everyone laughs.  
  
Gilliam: *Voice is shakey from being shaken.* This-is is far too cruel!!!!!!  
  
Pathas then smoke a joint and reclines back in his seat, but then sees Ice Cube move in next door.  
  
Pathas: What a day for drugs...  
  
Jim: Think he has any dope left? We're almost out.  
  
Melfina: What's today?  
  
Pathas: Friday.  
  
Gene: Aw shit, you know somethin's gonna happen.  
  
Pathas: But not right now! This shall be continued. In our next incident, Ice Cube and Chris Tucker guest star. And we find new uses for Gilliam! And like always, no plot at all! 


End file.
